WHAT THIS EPISODES ABOUT…
Woo! What a week this has been. I am so excited that so many of you are sharing the podcast with your friends. The downloads are mounting up! I am so grateful for all of you and the PM’s I am getting. Ok, today I am honoring you! Today I am filling your heart and soul, mind and thoughts with everything positive about the woman you are. Actually today YOU are filling your heart and soul, mind and thoughts with amazing truths as to what a brilliant and powerful woman you are.
If you listened to last week’s podcast you know that we affirmed how physically beautiful we are. We took back all of the negative thoughts and bullying thoughts we say about our bodies. We reclaimed the truth that when we see ourselves in complete beauty with all of our imperfections then we are on the true path of self love.
Today, we will do the same about how brilliant and capable we are! We affirm our own individual Intelligence! We claim our talents! Our Creativity! Our passions! Our parenting skills! Our athleticism! Our singing ability! Our dancing rhythms! OUR beautiful magnificent GENUINE SELF.
LEARN MORE ABOUT THE CONTENT DISCUSSED…
• Guy Free Podcast: https://guyfree.com
• Guy Free Facebook Group: https://guyfreeworkingonme.com
• Shauna’s website: https://www.workingonme.com
WHEN DOES IT AIR…
May 16, 2020
EPISODE TRANSCRIPT:
Hi Ladies!
I’m Shauna Hoffman
Woo! What a week this has been. I am so excited that so many of you are sharing the podcast with your friends. The downloads are mounting up! I am so grateful for all of you and the PM’s I am getting. Ok, today I am honoring you! Today I am filling your heart and soul, mind and thoughts with everything positive about the woman you are. Actually today YOU are filling your heart and soul, mind and thoughts with amazing truths as to what a brilliant and powerful woman you are.
If you listened to last week’s podcast you know that we affirmed how physically beautiful we are. We took back all of the negative thoughts and bullying thoughts we say about our bodies. We reclaimed the truth that when we see ourselves in complete beauty with all of our imperfections then we are on the true path of self love.
Today, we will do the same about how brilliant and capable we are! We affirm our own individual Intelligence! We claim our talents! Our Creativity! Our passions! Our parenting skills! Our athleticism! Our singing ability! Our dancing rhythms! OUR beautiful magnificent GENUINE SELF.
You see as humans we find that we are pigeon holed into what others expect from us, or validate in us, or claim for us. And when that happens the truth and beauty of your own god given talents tend to be pushed aside in order to please everyone else. On today’s podcast we are going to validate them together! We are going to affirm that you have every right to give breath and energy to them again in your life.
The first thing that I want to get out of the way is the way we compare ourselves to others! Why is it that we women compare ourselves all the time to other women? Why do we compare ourselves to our siblings or our parents, or that woman whose desk is down the aisle from us at work? Or the one that has a beautiful singing voice and we don’t. Why is it that we bully ourselves over what we cannot do well, instead of praising ourselves for what we can do?
Oh yeah… I can hear you screaming at me. Because that is what our world and so many cultures do. They pit us in competition with each other from the very first day we set foot in school. And before that our parents are judging us based on how we measure up to the kid down the street, or how fast our cousins are learning to read, or how well Susie can hit a softball at 5!
Add to that if your parent’s heritage is from a country where they value intelligence over playtime or creativity then you won’t be encouraged to flourish in the arts. Chances are you were sent messages from early in life that music, or culture or arts should take a back seat to intelligence. And your creativity was not honored or fed to flourish. It’s amazing how many cultures push down the creative spirit in order to put children’s intelligence ahead of anything else.
This holds true for everything! If your parent’s values were that women should merely get married and have children then you were not honored for much else! Not your intelligence, or your creativity, or talents unless they were ones that affirmed your ability to be a good wife…like cooking, or baking.
Now women! Let me make clear. A matter of fact, let me scream it to the world! I HONOR all the moms out there! The women who sacrifice every day for your children. What I am saying is that you are more than just that. And I want to feed those sides of you that maybe just maybe weren’t fed before. The creative thinker. The athlete. The brilliant businesswoman who hasn’t had a moment to go after her dreams yet, as she puts her family first. The writer who has had a story roaming around in her mind while she raises her children! The artist who sees the world like no other, yet has never believed she has a right to take time to sit down and write! The podcaster who has a voice and vision you want to share with the world, but you were told your voice does not matter.
I also honor all of the women who have been on the business or work path and dream of the day that you can have a family. The day that you are honored and your innate female nurturing is given the opportunity to create, like no other person of the opposite gender can!
Or maybe you want to stop working and grow a garden and people have made you believe that you won’t be as important to humanity if you are not a “working woman.”
Or maybe you want start your own business, or become a yoga instructor or healer. Sisterhood, there are so many sides of all of us. But our programming by others tends to set us on a path that is not our true dreams. The piece of this scenario that I want to address in THIS podcast is how we have let this programming take over our own brains and made us judge ourselves!
Ok, I will give you a few examples to help you get what I’m talking about. I will start with one of my own! My Grandmother was a kick ass woman who in the 20’s started her own business. She was one of the first women to wear pants on the streets of New York. She taught me that…are you ready? A woman does NOT belong in the kitchen! She had cooks that did all of the cooking for the family while she took on the business world and showed them what a woman could do in the 1930’s. As I grew up, Instead of watching my grandmother make cookies like most women got to do, I would go to her office with her and answer phones and watch her take on the world. Now my husband has a bone to pick with her because I don’t cook. And I don’t even want to try. Because when I do try to cook,I have absolutely no faith in my ability to make a delicious meal! I am actually intimidated by the kitchen now. But a business woman? Damn! I got that programming strong and I never question myself as a woman in business.
Part of what I want us to think about is how this weird negative programming actually makes us feel INCAPABLE of doing what is in our hearts. Truly I have to affirm over and over, I am a good cook, I am a good cook when I even attempt to cook. You see when we are intimidated out of doing what we love there is a silent message given to us that we would not succeed if we tried it.
Think about this. How many women that you know have been set on a life path based on what their parents believed they were good at? I had one of the sweetest teenage girls in my office. She was a star athlete soccer player. But her senior year she just wanted to quit and join the chorus and theater school. Her singing voice was angelic. She had such an artist’s soul. And she was ready to give up soccer and enter the arts and hopefully go to an arts college. As you can imagine, the conversations in my office with her parents were a true challenge. They could not see past their own ideas of what she should do with her life and her college choices. They threw away the idea that their daughter even had any vocal talent. They were trying to drill in to her their desires and they were trying to get me to go along.
As you can imagine that did not go far. My job was to empower this teen to find her true genuine self. And she absolutely knew it was not being a soccer star. And while I empowered her to go after her own dreams I also wanted to honor what her parents saw in her! This amazing athlete! The thing was, this teen actually saw it in herself! She didn’t question that! But she also saw another talent in herself that she wanted to be validated for. I was just so proud of her that she spoke up. She changed the trajectory of her life by claiming her own truth.
Here is one that jump started my dreams to become a therapist. I was looking for a way to give back. So I offered to start tutoring this 12 year old child who was suffering in school. It seems that the parents were not helping her at all. A matter of fact they kept telling her she was so stupid compared to her older sister. Her sister was quite smart. But they let this 12 year old know she would never be the smart one in the family. So what did she do? She believed it. She embraced that programming! She lived it. She gave up on her homework, she didn’t pay attention in class and she would tell me it doesn’t matter how much I help her, she is stupid and thats that.
So what did I do? I started every tutoring session with affirmations! Affirmations of how smart she is and how creative she is and how capable she is. Of course she fought me at first. That was some hard bullying thinking for me to help her get past. But we did it. And she flourished. It was then that I realized I wasn’t tutoring her, but doing therapy with her! And it was that moment that I decided to become a therapist. We were gifts to each other. That girl is now a college graduate who owns her own business!
Right on! We broke the conditioning! Actually, SHE broke her conditioning!
CAPABLE.
So for a moment I want you to think about yourself. I want you to think about what you feel your capabilities are in life. I want you to think about what you know in your soul you are capable of doing. Then ask yourself this. Did the people in my life agree with me and empower me in this thinking? Or did they make me feel LESS THAN and incapable?
Now I am going to list a few things that I want you to dig deep and think about. This is going to be an all-out moment of self awareness about your conditioning by others in your life.
So, if you are not driving and you want to stop and journal a bit about them then go for it. Pause me, hit pause, write and then come back!
Here goes…
Your intelligence!
*What were you taught to believe about how smart you are?
*What do YOU believe about how smart you are?
*Who in your life ever made you feel smart?
*Did anyone, in either your past or present put you down for your intelligence? Or make fun of you?
- Were you ever told to stop asking so many questions? Or were you encouraged to ask questions?
- Were you taught to appreciate wisdom and knowledge?
- Were you taught that intelligence is more important than anything else? Creativity or talent, or heart, kindness or compassion?
Ladies, this is some deep wok for sure. This is something that I hope you think further about…your belief in your intelligence!
Here are some affirmations to help you along the way!
*I am always open to wisdom and learning.
*I am an enthusiastic student of life, love and the pursuit of happiness. That is what makes me intelligent.
*I am becoming more and more knowledgeable every day. And I love becoming more knowledgable about myself.
*I am brilliant! And I love to share that with those who love me.
*I am the only one who knows how smart I really am! I need prove it to no one!
*I love expanding and improving my mind.
*I am fascinated by new thoughts and ideas.
For this one I want you to add in the thing you feel most knowledgable about! fill in the blank with such things as…the world, or the arts, or literature or accounting, or sailing, or parenting, or interior design, or sewing, or geology, or science. Whatever you know you are brilliant at!
*I am exceptionally intelligent and proud of my knowledge about….
Say it again!
*I am exceptionally intelligent and proud of my knowledge about….
Now think about your creative talents! The ones you know about and maybe no one else does!!! Singing, writing, speaking, art, design, dancing, cooking, gardening, business!
Affirm this!
Today I know deep in my soul that I am a great…. fill in the blank!
Doesn’t that feel amazing? Let’s do another exercise.
I want you to go back to the teenage girl that you were and think about the same thing! What did you know you were great at that no one else knew about. I don’t want you think about the ones you shared with the world for a minute. But the ones you didn’t! The ones you smile when you think about. The talents or wisdom that is lying waiting for you to acknowledge it again! Your secret.
Now fill in the blank…
*Today I remember that as a young me I loved to…… (fill in the blank)
*Today I remember that as a young me I loved to…… (fill in the blank)
Now your affirmation!!!! Repeat this.
*Today I claim back that side of me!
*If I choose to share it with the world I will.
- But if I choose to keep it as my perfect secret I can.
- Either way I KNOW in my soul that I am brilliant at it!
Oh… that just makes me smile!
OK, Let’s go big picture now on the affirmations! Think about them as I say them. See which ones you resist! And make sure you say those over and over again! Ladies. I believe in you and all that you are and all that you want to be!
Take a breath….
*I know i the deepest part of my soul that I am an intelligent and wise woman!
*I claim as my truth that regardless of what others think about me, I know who I am. I know my talents. I know my heart.
*I claim that it is just fine to not be perfect at everything I do or am supposed to know! By doing so I give myself a place to grow.
*I know that an artist can’t be perfect or she could not create.
* I love to imagine all that I love about myself being shared with the world!
- I only surround myself with those who know my heart and my mind and my talents and my intelligence and who honor it.
- I honor and love myself for all that I know, all that I have yet to learn and all that I want to be.
And so it is, ladies!!!!!! And so it is!!
Take the time to really think about this podcast. Take some time to write your own affirmations of self honoring and self love! Just take some time for you!!!
Sisterhood, thank you once again for letting me be with you today! Eat well, sleep well, have a load of fun and I can’t wait to pop back into your lives again next week!