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The Magic Of Living A Fulfilling Life

March 20, 2024 By Shauna

This season of A Journey to Awareness is titled The Rhythm of our Lives. So often when we talk about self awareness or genuine self we leave out something that’s at the core of our happiness…finding what fulfills us. Well, what the heck does that mean? And, can you be fulfilled in one part of your life and not another? Ok, the answer to that is yes. And what fulfills you may not fulfill me, or your partner, or parents, or children or anyone else in your life. Today, let’s think about just a few of the most important aspects of your life that gives you a sense that your life is magnificently fulfilled; full and filled with all that magic that is in you and of you and for you!

SHOWNOTES:

Hello and welcome to season two of A Journey to Awareness, I’m Shauna Hoffmann.

This season is titled The Rhythm of our Lives. So often when we talk about self awareness or genuine self we leave out something that’s at the core of our happiness…finding what fulfills us. That word is one that so many ads use and magazine covers… are you fulfilled in life?

Well, what the heck does that mean?

And, can you be fulfilled in one part of your life and not another? Ok, the answer to that is yes. And what fulfills you may not fulfill me, or your partner, or parents, or children or anyone else in your life.

Ok, let’s start with what does it mean to be fulfilled in life? For me it all comes back to the title of this season, the rhythm of our lives. Its when you can feel that you are exactly in rhythm with your heart, your desires, your joys. When you’re fulfilled and in tune with your soul’s rhythm you experience a deep sense of satisfaction, an overwhelming contentment and meaning in what you do and who you are. Being fulfilled is a state of being where you feel genuinely happy, at peace. But most importantly you feel aligned with your values, your passions, and most importantly your purpose.

For today, let’s think about just a few of the most important aspects of your life that gives you a sense that your life is magnificently fulfilled; full and filled with all that magic that is in you and of you and for you!

Let’s start with purpose! When you are fulfilled one of the purest joys is having found your place and your purpose in relationships, a sense of purpose in your spiritual and psychological growth, a clear sense of self and a purpose in your work! And most importantly, peace and fulfillment comes from a clear sense of how your life contributes to something larger than yourself. Knowing that your actions and efforts have meaning and contribute positively to the world or even merely to the person standing next to you is a huge boost to creating a fulfilling life. A life with purpose.

Next let’s talk about authenticity. One of the most important things that contributes to a life of fulfillment is living authentically. Authentic self! Genuine self! My favorite words in the world! This means being true to yourself, your values, your morals, your ethics and your beliefs. Living your life. When you align your actions and your choices with who you truly are, what you truly need, you can’t help but feel more fulfilled because you’re not pretending to be someone else or living according to others’ expectations. Living according to others’ expectations instead of your own is one of the most jarring and uncomfortable feelings. And the rhythm of your life knows it.

Now here is one of my favorite pieces of a life fulfilled. Its what my whole podcast is about. Your own journey to awareness. This journey is a lifelong adventure where you are continuously learning, growing, and evolving as a person! Developing new skills, pursuing new interests, overcoming challenges, and expanding your perspective on anything from food to politics, religion to choosing the clothes that you wear. It’s the beauty and grace of becoming aware of your own voice. So one of the most profound parts of being fulfilled is continuing your journey to awareness.

Ok, this next one is pretty obvious. Yet, its also the one that causes more heartache and blocks to true fulfillment. There is no question that living a fulfilling life means surrounding yourself with positive relationships, meaningful connections. How can you possibly be fulfilled in your life without nurturing healthy relationships with family or friends, partners? These relationships are our biggest teachers and our biggest obstacles. And let’s not forget our relationships to the communities that you are in? Community! Last night my husband and I went to a fundraiser for City of Hope. To be in a room filled with people in our town who were there with the same goal to give back was truly FULFILLING! My husband turned to me and said, “Wow, we live in a really great town.”

So you can see, this episode can go on and on! Finding fulfillment takes a whole lifetime for many. Talking about all the ins and outs, joys and challenges in one episode is never going to happen. There is so much to finding fulfillment in life. But I do want to touch on just a few more for you to think about.

Gratitude! Being grateful for what you have and living in the present moment! Wow! Can you feel yourself filling up when you think of what you are grateful for?

What about contributing to the lives of others? Whether it’s through acts of kindness, volunteering, mentoring, or simply being there for someone, this can create a profound sense of fulfillment. Just knowing that you’ve made a positive impact on others’ lives can be incredibly rewarding. And it doesn’t have to be on a large scale. It can be doing something for your child, or a neighbor. Saving a rescue dog! Feeding the birds in your yard. Those moments may seem so tiny. But they are the gold in the treasure of living a fulfilling life.

Now let’s think about how being aware and working on your own Health and Well-being brings you fulfillment ! How many days do your feel better about your life when you have taken care of your physical, mental, or emotional well-being?

Oooh, next let’s think about how achievements and success fulfill your soul. Accomplishing a meaningful goal whether big or oh so small, can change the rhythm of your day, your life, your soul. Sometimes for me its achieving a week of making my bed everyday! It’s crazy how proud of myself I am as I walk by my room! Aaah, the little things that fulfill my life!

Now let me share the final part of my being that truly fulfills me. It’s when I feel balanced in life. And really it’s balancing all the things I have spoken about so far.

I try and help my clients and myself strive for some kind of balance between work, relationships, hobbies, fun and relaxation, self growth, meditation, exercise! And I think we all know that this is by far the hardest thing to do. But it’s the crux of a fulfilling life. One minute we may fill our life with our work, the next a relationship, the next our own breaking free and finding ourselves by leaving a job or a relationship. Then there is balance in our family life. All of these individually create who we are. But by balancing it in a truly healthy way that’s when we are truly fulfilled. There is no longer a feeling that something is missing. We are filled. We are full. We are fulfilled!

It’s important to remember that fulfillment is a deeply personal experience. What brings fulfillment to you may be different for someone else. But when you take the time to understand yourself, what truly matters most to you, and you spend each moment pursuing a life that aligns with your values and your heart, then you have found the “rhythm of your life”!

Oh, I am so glad you joined me today. This podcast is truly a part of what fulfills my life. I’m so grateful for my listeners, soul partners on this journey to awareness as we each find the rhythms of our lives.

May the next week fill you with so much happiness, kindness to yourself and others. Eat healthy foods, drink lots of water, do something crazy and fun, fill your mind with lots of positive things and listen to amazing music as you find the rhythm of your soul. Thank you for letting me into your lives this week and look forward to popping back again next time.

Change Up The Radio Station To Your Soul

March 13, 2024 By Shauna

Hello and welcome back to a journey to awareness, I’m Shauna Hoffman.

This second season of my podcast is wrapped around something I call the rhythm of our lives. In the first episode I spoke about how our bodies, minds and souls can feel a rhythm to it if we are self aware enough to sense it. Maybe a vibration, maybe a new beat or melody that is trying to guide us to where we are supposed to be. I touched on the thought that sometimes we get stuck in the song of our current life. When everything in your life is begging you to change the radio station! Change that song! Let go! But something has held you back.

SHOWNOTES:

Like a record that keeps skipping. Or a Spotify channel that replays the same song over and over. Your spirit is wanting something so different but it just won’t change! In that moment you know you are craving a totally different vibration but it’s like Groundhog Day, over and over nothing changes.

Here’s the truth. That stuck feeling will eventually affect you in ways that you don’t expect. You start to feel anxious, or unmotivated, or even depressed! This is what happens when your soul knows it’s time for change and you can’t bring yourself do it.

Today, on the second episode of this season, I wanna delve into one of the most common things that stop us from changing. Even when your life is screaming for it! Friends are saying, “Come on, do it! Believe in yourself!” One of the biggest things that stop us is fear of failure!

And here is an interesting thing! Fear of failure is fear isn’t just about failing in the future. But it’s also a fear that if you make this change, leave that unhealthy relationship, end a marriage, quit your job, you are actually admitting defeat. So many times people will say to me it was a failed marriage. Uh, no. It didn’t fail. It ran its course! It wasn’t healthy anymore. You weren’t happy anymore. You lost your genuine self in deference to the marriage.

You are not a failure if you tried everything to make something work.

Ok, the stay or leave a relationship conversation…we’ll that’s a whole other topic for another day.

For today let’s play with some of these judgements that swirl around in your mind when your soul is screaming for change. “Shauna if I quit my job it must mean that I failed to make it work! I must not be smart enough, or savvy enough, or creative enough. Shauna, if I end this friendship it must mean that I am a horrible friend. Or this one, This diet sucks and I can’t do it. I failed at it. I’ll never lose weight.”

But listen carefully to this wisdom!

Change is not admitting defeat! Being self-aware enough to realize that something is no longer working for you, no longer making you happy no longer moving you forward in your life, no longer supporting your dreams then it’s time to change!

Here’s a really great quote by John Wooden that puts the word failure into a great perspective.

“Failure is not fatal. But failure to change might be”

Now to be clear I am not talking about cutting and running in times of challenges. I’m talking about being self aware enough to check in with your, body heart, soul and life’s rhythm. Let’s try a self awareness diagnosis.

Ask yourself.

Is your body trying to tell you something? Are you getting headaches? Are you feeling anxiety or stress. Are you sleeping? Clenching your jaw? Are you having feelings that are overwhelming and don’t seem to go away? This, despite any effort, you might make to manage them? Are you grouchy? Are you overeating to fill a void?

Then check in and ask yourself:

Do you feel fulfilled in your life? Wow, this one is so important. If you’re continually feeling so dissatisfied or restless or unfulfilled in your current situation, it is definitely a sign that something needs to change. So many people are brought up with this false belief that you’re not supposed to be fulfilled. You’re supposed to just get through life, work hard, make money or take care of family and that should be all it takes to be fulfilled. I beg to differ!

So my next podcast is going to be all about what it means to be fulfilled?

Ok back to your self awareness check in.

Here’s one that most people are afraid to look at. Joy.

It’s when activities or interests that normally bring you lots of joy no longer do. You’ve lost your passion or your interest in the current situation. Or your current situation has caused you to lose passion for life. I see this with so many clients! And friends! They’re just going through the motions every day with not very much Joy. And the funny part is that they don’t think that’s odd. For me, I truly believe that passion is what keeps us out of depression. I’m not talking about sexual passion or intimacy. I’m talking about that spark inside of us, that creates joy. In other words, is your current rhythm and song just boring as hell?

Ok, here is one of the most typical ways people avoid change. They self medicate. They might have those extra drinks a couple of times a week. Or find that they need to smoke weed when they come home at the end of the day. Then, some people actually have a little bit healthier way of self-medicating. ,,lol They kick up their adrenaline and their hormones by becoming workout addicts. Believe me working out is one of the best things that you could do for your moods, but not if that is the only thing that’s keeping you happy.

Oh, here’s a few other ways people go into denial that they are being called to make a change in their life. Being called to be uncomfortable for just a little while in order to find happiness. They turn all their attention on other people instead of themselves.

They put other people’s needs or the companies needs, or their friend’s or partner’s needs before their own needs. It’s self sacrifice. And wow it’s sure seems like a noble thing to do. Until it’s not. Until you are living everyone else’s song instead of your own.

So think about all the parts in your life and see if you are living in Groundhog Day. Relationship? Work? How you play? Yup… this can get boring, too. Have you wanted to move to another town, city, country? Learn something new? Change up your look? Clothes? Paint your house?

I won’t pretend that change is easy. I won’t pretend that change brings immediate joy. I won’t pretend that there are not lessons that go with it. But I will say that the lessons in your life and the difficulty and unhappiness you will feel if you DON’T change are much worse.

And here is the BEST part! I’m now going to list all of the amazing rewards to making change in your life!

Change, opens doors to new opportunities, new friendships, new possibilities and careers, new hobbies, new personal growth! Some of the best ways to grow as a human is to challenge yourself to step out of comfort zones and grow, learn something new, it gives you resilience, you learn and discover new strengths that you didn’t even know you had. And with THAT wow your confidence boosts to new highs, and that gives you the strength to take on even more challenges, tackle more obstacles which in turn builds more self-confidence, and more belief in yourself! It’s this fabulous trajectory of how one thing builds on the other! And with all of it, you find a new perspective on life. You start to see the world in a totally new way.

My favorite part… Change offers you a new sense of adventure and excitement. Sometimes that adventure and excitement is travel and sometimes that adventure and excitement is a new relationship or a new home or a new city or a new job! All of this gives you a new vitality and an energy for life and guess what your rhythm changes. And your song becomes your own! If you can embrace with an open mind and an open heart, you can create a life that brings you so much, vibrancy and meaning and possibilities!

So go ahead change that Spotify in your soul! Turn up the volume! And sing!

Beautiful listeners, thank you so much for joining me on this podcast today. Please be good to yourselves! Surround yourself with loving beings, take chances in life, drink, lots of water, try new adventures, and most of all be kind and gentle with yourself. Thank you for letting me into your life this week and I look forward to checking in again next time.

It seems Again those are interesting ways to avoid that your life is desperately begging for something new. Something that’s going to take you out of the feeling that you’re living in a Groundhog Day

Here are my steps

Fear of Failure: Fear of failing can hold people back from taking risks or making changes in their lives. This fear can prevent them from pursuing new opportunities or making necessary changes.

Lack of Confidence: Low self-esteem or confidence can make it difficult for individuals to believe in themselves and their abilities. This lack of belief can lead to inertia and a sense of being stuck.
Comfort Zone: People often become accustomed to their routines and comfort zones, making it challenging to step outside of familiar territory. This fear of the unknown can keep them from exploring new paths.

Negative Thought Patterns: Persistent negative thoughts and beliefs can create a mental barrier to progress. These thoughts can be self-limiting and prevent individuals from seeing possibilities beyond their current situation.

Lack of Clarity or Goals: Without clear goals or a sense of direction, it’s easy to feel adrift and stuck. Not knowing what one wants or how to achieve it can create a sense of being trapped in one’s circumstances.

External Circumstances: Sometimes, circumstances beyond our control, such as economic challenges, health issues, or family responsibilities, can make it difficult to move forward or make changes.
Procrastination: Putting off important decisions or actions can lead to a feeling of being stuck in a rut. Procrastination can prevent progress and maintain the status quo.

Unhealthy Relationships: Toxic or unsupportive relationships can drain energy and create a sense of being trapped. Breaking free from these relationships can be challenging but necessary for personal growth.

Lack of Resources: Limited access to resources such as time, money, education, or opportunities can hinder progress and make it challenging to change one’s circumstances.

Past Trauma or Events: Past experiences, especially traumatic ones, can have a lingering impact on a person’s mindset and behavior. Unresolved trauma can hold individuals back from moving forward.

Breaking free from feeling stuck often involves self-reflection, seeking support, setting goals, and taking small steps towards change. Therapy, coaching, self-help techniques, and building a support network can all be valuable.

Ha. For those of us who remember, turntables, or the new generations who have found this magical treasure from the past. Ok, we were on a Virgin Voyages cruise last month and Richard Branson’s design team put turntables and albums in our cabins! It was fabulous!

Ok I digress. enough to have one now! when it’s time to change the radio station! Time to break.

70 Rhythm of Our Lives

March 6, 2024 By Shauna

Hello and welcome, I’m Shauna Hoffman. I am so excited to be back with a New season of A Journey to Awareness Podcast.

When I finished the last series of podcasts, I found myself searching for what I wanted to talk about, and share with you, and even experience for myself differently than before, in the last year and a half I have had so many experiences that have shown me something that I would like to call….the rhythm of my life. So I decided to call this season’s podcasts just that. The Rhythm of our Lives. We are going to explore all the things that change our rhythms. Like friendships, breakups, moves, new jobs, losses, births and of course family. So I hope you come with me as we explore the ever changing song that is you.

SHOWNOTES:

I have spent the last year on my own journey to awareness. World travels, new opportunities, new people in my life, the loss of my father, betrayal and deep love.

I have had one new learning after another! Then I started to feel it all in my body…in my soul.

Like a song.

I realized that there are times in my life my rhythm was very fast, often staccato just like a song. If I took a moment and checked in with my body I could feel it. I could feel a beat. And then something would happen and it would change. I found that I was experiencing life like a song! So I looked back at the last year and a half and I thought. OK maybe it wasn’t one song, maybe it was a full album! Have you ever noticed that when artists go through a break up, they produce an entirely different kind of music then when they are madly in love? And why is it that music tells our stories in so many ways?

I started to think about that and all of a sudden I got this epiphany that my entire life is actually an album of one song after another. I was music! Each time in my life had a different rhythm, different lyrics, sometimes the music coming from inside me felt louder and brassier, other times I could feel my body, my mind and my spirit in a soft flow.

When I think of the rhythm and music that is me, there were times, when I felt like a fast dance song, that kept building and building and building into an incredible frenzy! Those times happened a lot when I was young. Heart pumping love affairs, new jobs that made me a nervous wreck with anticipation, excitement and very often fear.

And then there were other times where I found myself living the life of a jazz song, easy and smooth and melodic, sometimes sleepy and relaxing. This is the grace and joy of getting older. We know how to sit and listen to our own rhythm versus being guided by things outside of us. Or if they are outside of us we have created a life where our journey has taught us the tools to not become a frenzied mess.

And then there were those times where my life was experiencing adventure, travel, new cultures, the unknown. On my travels i would keep my heart and eyes wide open and i kept a consciousness and a willingness to change my rhythm as I traveled. A spontaneity. I found that my rhythm was in tune with whatever culture I was in. Island ease on a South Pacific beach, or classical as my body felt like the melody of a Bach song roaming the streets of Europe.

In the last year I have traveled to the Caribbean and felt the sun and sand melt away the everyday rhythms I usually feel in my body. Then I went on a spiritual retreat to Teotihuacan with my soul sister and studied ancient Toltec philosophy while walking the pyramids and challenging my thinking, my beliefs, my identity.

I love this quote by Toltec Master Don Miguel Ruiz because it was so much my experience on that trip in his Toltec world.

Life is like dancing. If we have a big floor, many people will dance. Some will get angry when the rhythm changes. But life is changing all the time.

On this trip, in the world of the Toltecs, when my awareness was being challenged, my current thoughts, beliefs and my reality, I found myself feeling the rhythm of drums beating heavy in my body, yet none were there. It was if my current thoughts, beliefs and my reality were being beaten like a drum out of me. The next moment when I came to some sense of peace around my new awareness the beating stopped. And soon a beautiful gentle rhythm took over in my body and my soul. One that actually felt the most genuine and peaceful I had ever experienced.

Then on this life changing trip we ended the week with a fire walk. And my rhythm went from gentle peace to wild staccato to the most expanding feeling I have ever known. Like my body was a jazz band walking the streets of New Orleans.

So I began to wonder is it a rhythm-like feeling within my body or a vibration? It wasn’t as if this new epiphany was writing songs in my head. It wasn’t about lyrics. It was about an energy that I could feel vibrate through my whole body. Sometimes it was a peaceful energy. Sometimes it was an exciting energy. And then I began to wonder which comes first? Is this vibration and energy that my body is feeling what is creating within me a desire to go on an adventure? Or is it the thought process of going on an adventure that’s creating this incredibly different energy and vibration in my body? Most importantly if I listen closely what are my rhythms telling me?

Then after much contemplation I wondered does it really even matter?

When I talk about a journey to awareness, one of the tools to awareness is knowing what you’re feeling, thinking, believing in the moment. So I thought to myself that my own journey to awareness today, just today, was going to be trying to tune into my rhythm.

So if you are willing, I want you to take a minute and see if you can feel your rhythm. Feel the energy moving through you. Close your eyes and take a nice big exhale now take another breath in and exhale. Now see if you can feel your rhythm.

Is your heart beating fast?

Is your mind able to quiet itself?

What does your body feel like? I will throw some rhythms out and see if any feel like you.

Breathe in. Out.

Is your life and rhythm right now a heavy rock song?

A rap song?

R and B perhaps?

Is it the Caribbean island beat of a reggae song?

Is it the gentleness of a Hawaiian or South Pacific rhythm?

Is it the easy going vibe of 70s yacht rock?

Is it in a classical rhythm and mood?

Is it a smooth jazz song?

Is it the simplicity of a country song?

Is it the ease of a rat pack song?

Take a moment as I get quiet and I want you to feel the rhythm of your body right now.

Great, open your eyes.

If you like to journal, take a few moments today and reflect on your life. Reflect on the different times and experiences and how your rhythm changed. Then I want you to ask yourself a very profound question. Is it time to reset your rhythm because your energy is stuck on one from your past?

For instance, during times of loss our rhythm and vibration is so very heavy. Often people who have a hard time healing from the loss carry that rhythm in their souls for a very long time. Often their life changes and lifts them into new experiences yet they cannot shake the heavy sad rhythm. Or, for some, they find a comfort in returning to the heavy sad beat, almost fearful to let go of it.

Other times someone may be trying to stay in an upbeat rhythm when their life is asking them to slow down that beat. Honor the change and sit with it a while.

It’s as if in both of these situations your mind, your thoughts, are causing this massive glitch by trying to be both rhythms at once.

This is when self awareness comes in. Is it time to let go of one rhythm so you can find peace, or healing, or joy?

Is it time to change the radio channel in your soul?

I love this quote by Edward Hirsch because it helps us realize that we can actually let our rhythms guide us out of what we think is where we are supposed to be.

“Rhythm is sound in motion. It is related to the pulse, the heartbeat, the way we breathe. It rises and falls. It takes us into ourselves; it takes us out of ourselves.”

It takes us out of ourselves. We each have the power with true self awareness to listen to the beat of our souls. And with that same self awareness we have the power to change it!

Beautiful souls, welcome back to A Journey to Awareness. And as I welcome you back I also welcome myself back!

Please be kind to yourselves. Drink lots of water, surround yourself with loving beings and listen to amazing music that touches your soul! Thank you for letting me into your lives this week and I look forward to welcoming you back again, next time.

69 Unlock The Golden Handcuffs To Your Dreams

June 18, 2022 By Shauna

Hello and welcome to a Journey to Awareness, I’m Shauna Hoffman

Oh, so many journeys to delve into today! Journeys that take us on adventures around the world. And journeys that take us to the deepest parts of our psyche and soul. And sometimes they go together! Today I am going to dig into the idea of The Golden Handcuffs! If you have never heard that saying before it was originally used by companies that kept giving perks and financial incentives to their employees in order to keep them from quitting or going elsewhere. Get it? Golden Handcuffs? Well in the world of psychotherapy we have come to use that saying to show that sometimes we stay in relationships way too long because we don’t want to give up the lifestyle we have at the time. Or we don’t go after our passions because the job we are in has us so quote-unquote “secure” that we push our dreams aside in order to keep the money status quo.

SHOWNOTES:

But the golden handcuffs are truly handcuffs that are tying you down and keeping you from your happiness! Ok, I won’t sugarcoat that sometimes the fear of living a different lifestyle…less than what we are living now, can be really frightening. But the unhappiness that goes along with that really great pool, or driving that sports car, or wearing those designer clothes cannot heal a lonely heart. It can’t quiet that haunting feeling, or guilt when you are pushing aside the messages from your soul that there is something else and it is waiting for you! Something that feels more right than the current not-so-right. Something that represents you to the deepest part of your being. So in the end it comes down to deciding… what’s important in life!

On the other side of the coin, when we’re secure in our finances, The Golden handcuffs also come into play in the way we spend our money. Or our fears around spending our money. What can we afford? What money are we willing to part with in order to go after our dreams? Can we unlock the handcuffs to stretch our finances to fulfill a dream? Can we change jobs in order to fulfill our souls versus our bank accounts? Can we take that one very special trip we’ve always dreamed of?

My husband and I recently kicked out a Galapagos cruise website, cruisingtotheglapgos.com …because we have a dream of sailing to these magical islands filled with the most extraordinary wildlife. Have you ever heard of a place where the wildlife have no fear of humans? It happens on The Galapagos. They come right up to you, or casually walk right by you! You can swim with the penguins or surf with the seals. It’s like no experience anywhere in the world. But on the other hand, it is really expensive. I have taken over 200 cruises all around the world and nothing has called to me more than this cruise. And there it was. The bank account Golden handcuffs. Do we dig into our savings and splurge on our biggest dream vacation ever? Or do we let it sit in the bank and collect interest until someday when we may need it?

Maybe it’s the golden handcuffs. Or is it fear around lack? Fear around the unknown what ifs? What if we have a house emergency or a medical emergency?

We talked it all through and then we had a change in perception! It didn’t take us long to realize that life is too short, the world is changing, and we don’t know what our futures will bring us, especially after the Covid hell we have all just gone through. But if I let go of fear, and look at what my true passions and dreams are then why the hell would I not book this trip? And What if the what-ifs are actually a huge financial windfall or success? What if can go both ways!

And there ya have it. The golden handcuffs are really just the word fear wrapped up in shiny gold. And it most often keeps us from choosing our own happiness. I love to have my clients really think about how money affects their lives. Obviously, we need it to survive. So many people have struggled in the last year and so many are still struggling.

So how does that affect the way they look at money?

Have you ever thought about what money is? I have! It’s really just another form of energy exchange!

Think about it… someone creates a handmade chair. They use their creative energy and physical energy to design and build it. Then they sell it and get paid for it. Money is the exchange for their energy!

Then the chair maker takes that money and goes to the farmers market and buys fruit. Fruit that was grown with the energy of the farmer. So the chair maker exchanges the energy he received in the form of money and gives it to the farmer…

Then the farmer buys a dress for his little girl… he exchanges that energy he received in the form of money and he gives it to the dressmaker. And it goes on and on from there! All that energy has just been shared around the world. All that money is is the energy of thousands and thousands of people around our planet.

Now the big stuff….
I like to ask my clients to look at the Golden Handcuffs in a different way. What if the golden handcuffs are not about how much money we have or make… but what if it is about the way we perceive money. And what if the way we perceive money is wrapped around what we believe we deserve in life?

There are so many books on this topic. When I did some of my own internal work around money and what I believe I deserve I was fascinated by what I learned. There is a great book, written years ago called The Dynamic Laws of Prosperity by Catherine Ponder. She talks about the concept of the Vacuum Law of Prosperity. She says that if you want greater good in your life, greater prosperity, and greater happiness then you have to form a vacuum to receive it. You have to get rid of what you don’t want to make room for what you do want. It is the same concept in Feng Shui. In other words, you have to empty a space for the universe to fill it. Or better yet, for you to fill it!

Let me say this. I am not suggesting that you spend your money without thinking about how much you can spend without putting yourself in debt. Or irrationally making decisions. I am asking you to make sure that you give your dreams and happiness as much weight as you give your bank account.

Let me say that again…

I am asking you to make sure that give your dreams and happiness as much weight as you give your bank account.

When I did that for myself I thought about every vacation or trip I have taken and the experience that I have had. Traveling I have lived and learned so much more than I ever could have at home. I have been challenged to let go of my pre-conceived ideas about people, cultures, and the world. When I think of the things in life that have had lasting impacts on me, memories that touch me deeply, they are invariably from an adventure I’ve been on.

And so it is! That’s all it took for me to realize I am booking my Galapagos cruise.

I have talked about many of my adventures on my podcasts… walking the streets of Budapest with my Hungarian mom, finally visiting and meeting the Cuban people, my 50th birthday hiking the trails the Incas did to Machu Picchu, and seeing the Southern cross along the way! Riding a camel in Egypt as I stare at the pyramids! Wineries in Italy, the ruins in Greece, horseback riding in Mexico. How they taught me to love and respect other cultures.How I learned so much about myself on every one of them.

How can I ever put a dollar amount on how those trips touched my soul? I can’t. I know that they cost me money. Do I remember how much? No! But do I absolutely know how each of them changed my life? Yes!

So I am going for it. The golden handcuffs will not stop me from walking with giant tortoises on The Galapagos and seeing the dance of the blue-footed booby!. After all, I truly believe that the vacuum I create will be filled with more joy than I can possibly imagine! And the energy I receive back from the energy I put out will be shared all around the world.

So what are your golden handcuffs?

What have you wanted in life that money has kept you from?
What changes have you avoided because you have not wanted to unlock the golden handcuffs?

And most importantly what do you deserve in your life?

I am excited to share that I have a women’s retreat with an amazing therapist and life Coach, Molly Lyda this October. And what is the name of it? “It’s my turn”. A three-night Journey to awareness lovefest to honor all that you deserve and love about yourself! It is all about claiming your right to happiness! Check it out on my blueoceanretreats.com website.

So now it’s your turn. Take some long walks and think about this episode and what it means to you! Journal! Look up at the stars and let your own dreams come to life. You don’t need a shooting star to wish on. You can do it for yourself! Unlock the golden handcuffs, stretch your arms out to the universe and live life to your absolute fullest!!

To all of the amazing souls listening today, thank you for letting me into your lives this week and I look forward to popping back in again next time.

68 Kick it Up, Or Take a Break, What’s Your Me Time?

April 30, 2022 By Shauna

Hello and Welcome back to a Journey To Awareness, I’m your host Shauna Hoffman. Thanks for joining me today! As many of you know, cruises, sailing, or being anywhere near or on the water is my happy place…my home away from home. I swear I was a mermaid in a past life. Or who knows! Maybe I was the Captain of a tall ship or a brilliant female pirate, like Anne Bonny. Whatever got me addicted to the water I am grateful. This got me thinking about what draws us to places to just getaway. And what kind of getaway do people crave? I ask you… Kick it up or take a break? What’s your ME time?

Ready? Let’s go…

SHOWNOTES:

Hello and Welcome, I’m Shauna Hoffman.

So first let’s break down ME TIME! because I know so many of my listeners struggle to honor themselves and take the breaks that they need to recoup, replenish, revive themselves, and breathe.

And for some of them, it’s not the “quiet time” they need. Its playtime! Remember what it means to play? That’s having fun! Being Creative! Letting loose! Kicking up your heels! Laughing! Socializing! Dancing! Believe me, playtime is just as reviving to your soul as sleeping on a beach or gazing into the waves on the ocean, or reading a book in bed.

In my two businesses, therapy and my travel biz I love to explore what my clients need to be at peace and happy. I have women who spend their days taking so much care of others that they have not even realized how exhausted or on empty they are. And yet, those same women have not had any time for fun in their lives other than playing with their kids. I have couples whose fun revolves around their kids and have not been on a vacation of their own in years. They have lost touch with all the fun they used to have before their kids were born. I have businesswomen who take their work with them on every vacation they take! They swear they couldn’t get away without their laptop or tablet. God knows what would happen if they missed an email or a call.

How is that downtime?

“DOWNTIME”…. time when you have no responsibility to anyone or anything except yourself. Let me repeat that.

DOWNTIME…. is when you have no responsibility to anyone or anything except yourself.

I love that when I looked up this phrase the Oxford dictionary says “it’s a time during which a machine, especially a computer, is out of action or unavailable for use.”

So what does this mean for you? When are you out of action or unavailable for use by others? And how much guilt would you have if you decided that you deserve that ME time?

My goal for all of you is that you answer “None! I would have no guilt!”

During what my hubby calls “The Cove Times…during the height of covid lockdown….. people experienced what they thought was downtime. Some were forced into less activity. Yet, so many others had their responsibilities doubled! Taking care of a family, home, and animals and doing this working from home! Not to mention all the stress and fear that surrounded us about staying safe and healthy. What for some was a break… for others was their own tiny hell! Downtime during “the cove times” was not downtime.

So I ask you when was the last time you made a point to have ME time? Time for just ME? When was the last time you chose yourself over everyone else?

I can almost hear the rumblings through the airwaves. “I can’t take time for myself. No one can cover for me.”

Or… “I can take the time but I won’t because people will think I’m selfish.” Really what people? If they love you they would want you to recoup. Besides, you know my saying… just tell them, “What you think of me is none of my business.” Usually, when my clients tell me this I remind them that no one else can make them feel anything. YOU are the one who is not standing up for yourself and choosing to feel guilty. You are the one choosing to not put yourself first.

ME TIME! Making a moment about just me!

Now back to my first question… Kick it up or take a break? What’s your ME time? And do you even know? When I help my clients both in travel and in therapy plan their ME time I help them look for balance. If they are going going going, physically active, then I help them see if they need time for their body and mind to relax. And what would that look like for them? A beach? A Cabin in the woods? A balcony on a cruise looking out over the ocean?

Or if they are in a world that keeps them sedentary, behind a desk, or these days on zoom calls all day do they need action, to move, to have fun, high energy to recoup the life in their life? Do they need to dance, or run, or go skiing or sailing!

I have told this story before. But when I was in the last month of getting my Master’s Degree I truly was on empty! A year and a half of school with no breaks, homework late into the night, and writing my thesis paper. Studying for my finals had taken its toll on me. It’s funny, here I was studying to be a psychotherapist and I had lost myself. Then one day I decided to practice what I was learning. Check-in… self-awareness… being aware of SELF!

It hit me. I needed to be outside! I had been indoors glued to computers for almost 2 years and I didn’t feel human anymore. So, I asked my friend to take me for a hike in the California mountains. I knew I had so much studying to do. But I also knew that if I didn’t I would not have the bandwidth to do everything I needed to do to graduate.

Se we packed up our water bottles and sandwiches and headed to the mountains. I can’t even tell you what that day was like for me. The memory of it is like a dream. I think I floated down every path, touched every leaf of every tree, listened for birds singing and stared at the blue blue sky. When we got to a trickling river I just sat there in silence. The power of mother earth to heal. The sound of water calming my soul.

I reflect on that day so often in my life when I feel out of balance. I ask myself what I need right now to feel balanced. And more than that, what I need right now to feel happy!

There’s a concept! Doing things that make us happy! Make US happy! Not others! What makes YOU happy?

So let’s do a little check-in…. every listener will answer these questions differently.

When was the last time you spent time in nature?

When was the last time you put down your phone or computer and got off all electronics?

When was the last time you talked for an hour face to face with a good friend or your sister, or mom or your partner?

That question is so important. Human contact is what so many of us lost during The Cove Times. Do you crave to be around people right now? To laugh with someone, share your spirit with someone willing to share theirs with you?

Now the opposite!

When was the last time you were by yourself? Sitting in silence with your own thoughts?

If you have been alone…when was the last time you actually listened to your SELF, checked in with your SELF instead of filling your alone time with stuff…. social media, Wordle, and Candy crush?

Now do a body check!

When was the last time you took a nice long walk, or got on a bike, or did yoga or danced? Or hiked and touched every leaf as you walked by it? Is your body craving action?

Now your mind! When was the last time you actually gave your racing mind a break? Meditated? Put down your to do list. Or just stopped adding to it? Breathed? Silence?

Or on another note…for those who have not had time to stimulate their minds, when was the last time you learned something new? Or began to write that book you have been dreaming of writing? When was the last time you touched your creativity?

All of this is the answer to balance! All of this is the question I ask my clients when we are trying to find their next ME time vacation! Are they going to Italy and learning Italian along the way? Are they going on a sail to the Caribbean and lying in the sun with a book in hand? Are they going on a writer’s retreat and kicking up their dreams? Are they off on a cruise that has it all? Food, balconies to watch the water, dancing all night, ports of calls to meet new people? Ok, truly this is why I love cruising! It has it all for whatever mood I’m in. I recently counted up how many days I have been at sea…and I realized I have now spent three years of my life onboard cruise ships. It’s my home away from home. Put this mermaid on the water and I am happy. I am at peace.

Where do you feel at home when you are not at home? What place in the world feels like you just belong?

Here is a quote I love from Oprah…

“Alone Time is when I distance myself from the voices of the world so I can hear my own”.

Everyone’s ME time is going to be different. And each of your me time needs will change moment by moment, day by day, year by year. The answer to all of the knowingness around your needs is back to the point of this podcast. Self-awareness. Checking in with self, taking your SELF off of remote control. Listening to your heart, your mind, your soul….even your own breath.

I am excited to share that I will be doing a retreat with another amazing woman, Molly Lyda on the Navigator of the Seas for three nights of ME TIME! When we came up with our dream around what this weekend would look like it all came back to the idea that sometimes we just need to say… It’s My Turn!” So that is what this weekend cruise will all be about. We will be helping each of the mermaids sailing with us to choose to look within. Choose ME.

As Molly says, “Nurturing ourselves with a get-away like this brings SO much possibility into our life! When we take the time to reflect, relax and explore on the inside, we gain clarity around our true desires and we invite more abundance in on the outside.”

I love that. We all know that when we recoup, bring balance back into our lives, and honor ourselves, then we make space for our own dreams to come true.

If you want to join us it is October 7-10, 2022 out of Los Angeles. You can read about it on my website blueoceanretreats.com. I do hope you join us.

I do hope this episode has brought you the desire to ask yourself… ‘What is it that I NEED RIGHT NOW TO make me happy? “

Kick it up or take a break? What’s your ME time?

I hope that between now and the next time we meet on the airwaves or on the high seas you honor your SELF. You nurture your SELF! You listen to your SELF! You CHOOSE “ME!”

Thank you for letting me into your lives this week and I look forward to popping back in again next time!

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