This is one of my favorite phrases of all time. You know that moment when you are shocked that you are engaging with someone who is just pissing you off? That moment when you find yourself arguing the inarguable with someone who just won’t listen? Yet, you keep talking? All of a sudden you are dragged into a storm and your mind is screaming how am I going to get out of this? This is how. You just say to yourself, I don’t do this. We all have our opinions and our desire to be heard. But sometimes, with some people, there is no way to be heard.
I just don’t do this.
I don’t engage with someone who is disrespecting me.
I don’t allow myself to be bullied.
I don’t pretend that it is ok.
I don’t do this.
You have to be your own barometer of what you can take. You have to check in with yourself and know that you are being pushed passed the place that you feel comfortable. Or more importantly, feel safe. And then YOU have to say, I don’t do this.
Is this true in relationships? Yes. The most profound place to use this powerful sentence is when you realize that you are stuck in an unhealthy, emotionally scarring relationship; whether friend, family member or lover. The most honest and kind sentence you can ever learn for yourself is I don’t do this.
Now that is self awareness.